I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
