She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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