I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize
