is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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