why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Randomize
