Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
