Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
