Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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