Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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