i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
