Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
