just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
