Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
