IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
