found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Randomize
