My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
