I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
