they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
