He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Randomize
