it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
