Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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