alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Randomize
