remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
