Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
