you turned your livingroom into a bong?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
