It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize