I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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