i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
