the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
foreskin is a definite game changer
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Randomize
