I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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