how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
