If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
this beer tastes like vomit already
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
she told me i tasted like america
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize
