he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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