i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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