is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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