GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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