I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
kristin has been a bad kristin
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
