oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
