So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
