I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
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