i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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