covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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