he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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