it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I have feelings that need drinking.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
