so explain again why im purple
no
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize