how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
