I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Everclear isn't food dammit
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
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