On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
