Welp...herpes.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
