Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize