Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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