Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize